Devious Cornbread

I have written about my suitemates before, not always in the most flattering of terms. ("They are all very thin. They think that cauliflower makes the perfect dessert. They're in Running Club.") But if Jen's recent behavior don't beat all, I don't know what does. She decided to embark on some moronic "challenge" where all she eats are fruits and vegetables. Healthy, except the part where you get no protein, fat or carbohydrates. I was very against this idea, and so I fought against it the only way I knew how – telling her so, loudly and obnoxiously. And baking.

Jen LOVES cornbread. It is her favorite food. And why not? Cornbread is tasty, nutritious (sorta) and easy to make. All you have to do is observe our coffee table, which currently has two bags of cornbread on it; we all know how much Jen loves cornbread, and so whenever the Ivy Room is selling it, we all buy a bag to bring to her. BECAUSE WE CARE ABOUT HER AND WANT HER TO EAT FOOD.

So I devised a devious, devious plan to get her to break her ridiculous diet. I whipped up a batch of cornbread, and when she came in, I was sitting there, smiling and offering her a piece of still-warm cornbread. "I'll eat this later," she said, taking it to her room with her. I wondered if she was going to eat it in secret. I had just found out, to my delight, that our suitemate Emily had failed the "challenge" thanks to my delicious cornbread!

Later that night, I admitted the plan to Jen. "And here I thought you were trying to be nice!" she exclaimed. "And I was trying to spare your feelings by taking the cornbread to my room and saying I would eat it later." Then she and Emily got into an involved discussion over whether or not Jen's saving the cornbread rather than eating it proved that she loved it more or less than Emily. It was involved.

Now Jen's diet is over and the bags of cornbread on our coffee table will soon be gone, but the cornbread recipe lives on! It was so delicious. I worried it would be too sweet, and if you like Southern-style cornbread it probably will be, but for me (and more importantly for Jen) it was just right. It was fluffy, moist and totally low-maintenance; a breeze to put together, and it baked like a dream, perfectly evenly. I may have to make some more, now that Jen is done, to prove that I'm not just a devious witch and what women's magazines would call a "bad friend" for trying to break her diet.


Cornbread Recipe
from AllRecipes

Ingredients

• 1/2 cup butter
• 2/3 cup white sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 cup buttermilk
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 cup cornmeal
• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease an 8 inch square pan.
2. Melt butter in large skillet. Remove from heat and stir in sugar. Quickly add eggs and beat until well blended. Combine buttermilk with baking soda and stir into mixture in pan. Stir in cornmeal, flour, and salt until well blended and few lumps remain. Pour batter into the prepared pan.
3. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 40 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.